Posted on: 3rd July 2025

There’s no correct formula to handle bad news as Christians. Like any other human being, it’s perfectly normal to feel overwhelmed, that we can’t cope, that we are falling apart when we receive bad news, especially when the bad news is severe. There is nothing wrong with us, nothing wrong with our faith if we are hit by a shock wave and pulse with shock inwardly. Like the psalmist, we can cry out to God in lament and questioning grief. Sometimes we experience a hardening of the ‘oughteries,’ I ought to be able to cope, I should be able to hold it together. That’s not true at all. Look at Elijah when he flees from Jezebel. Consider the agony of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane.

It’s also understandable that we can be in denial or look at the gap between where we are (in pain), and where we want to be (not in pain). If we keep looking at that gap, we can increase our pain because it is not a gap we can close right now. At some point, we have to say to ourselves, ‘I accept this is the reality I face right now.’ If we can do something to change it, then we can commit to that. We might need to pray the Serenity prayer, ‘God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change…’

Very often, we are taught to be self-sufficient in our culture, that we can’t ask for help. But do ask for help. Find someone who can listen and keep listening. It must be the right person. Sometimes things are so traumatic, we can’t find the words to express what we are going through. Find someone who is safe, who believes you, who will be there for you consistently. Be that sort of person for others. Don’t be like the person in the Adrian Plass sketch saying to a bereaved person, ‘have you moved on yet?’ 

In the storm, if possible, it can help to find an anchor. It might be a simple prayer, or verse of scripture we say repeatedly. It might be paying attention to our breath, or our feet on the ground. It might be our friends, church, community. It might be gardening, going for a walk, having a cup of tea. It might be simply crying out, ‘Lord Jesus!’ 

It maybe that none of this helps, and that’s ok. Sometimes we just need to know we are loved. A simple prayer I use when I don’t have any answers, for myself or others is this one:

May the love of Christ take hold of me
May the light of Christ shine in my heart.
May the love of Christ flow through me like a river.

May the love of Christ take hold of you, right here, right now.
May the light of Christ shine in your heart.
May the love of Christ flow through you like a river, wherever you are.

By Rev Dr Shaun Labert, Scargill Movement.